The Rise of the Manbo

I have decided to coin a new term today, and that term is “manbo,” the male equivalent of “bimbo.” We have seen more than a few of these odd creatures popping up over the last few years, especially in places like reality television on shows like The Bachelor. If you would like to become amanbo manbo, the first thing you need to do is exercise – a lot. It’s really quite helpful if you can find some steroids, but if you can’t then regular trips to GNC for supplements would be the next best thing. It’s also quite helpful to never stand too close to your razor, to find a doctor who will write you prescriptions for some testosterone supplements, to seriously consider hair and beard implants, to spend a ridiculous amount of money on clothing and haircuts, and to read as little as humanly possible. In all things, you should strive to make your contribution to the betterment of society as small as possible. You will want to subscribe to magazines like GQ, Men’s Journal, and every exercise and fitness magazine you can find, but only for the pictures. You will be needing frequent manicures, and so you will need to be sure that you don’t do anything with your hands that might disturb that manicure. In short, you will need to become completely vacuous. It would help if you could move to Southern California. You have to move quickly, because your window of opportunity will close at approximately age thirty-five. After age thirty-five you will be too old to be a sought-after manbo and will spend the rest of your days waiting tables in trendy little restaurants, searching for your testosterone shrunken testicles, and seeking treatment for the sexually transmitted infections you acquired during your career as a manbo. We all have dreams…

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